August 4, 2008

That dress looks like the dangly earrings you buy at the dollar store

Dear Canon Powershot AbunchofnumbersIdon'tcaretoobserve,
I HATE YOU. It's called uploading videos, you moron. Hope you feel awesome.
The end.
Tavi

Still trying though! I haven't really been thinking about dressing lately since I've been at our cottage, where I usually focus on just being comfy, wearing shorts and a tank top. So while I'm here and feeling deprived of good clothes, I've decided to do a fall wishlist. Yes, it's that time of year my friends! K-Mart starts airing their back-to-school commercials starring that annoying little blue lightbulb, CVS workers are hanging up signs in the windows with deals on the "hottest binders" (is there such a thing?), and the leaves are starting to change colors. I made up the leaves bit-but MAN don't you wish it were true? Not that I want school, but this sticky weather is making me retrieve my boring clothes! Anyways, here we go. Alas, my paint skills will never be as tight as Bianca's!
1. American Apparel sunglasses. These are magical. That model is lucky she can even be in their prescence, let alone get her picture taken with them, not to mention get to WEAR THEM. I bet sunshine is radiating out of her tush. LOATHE.

2. Fredflare romper thing. It's so cute and girly, but would also look awesome all ragged up. Could wear this Sam or Yoncto style.

3. FF 123, ABC sweatshirt. How theme-perfect is this? Fate, I tell you. If I got this I'd want a huge baggy size rather than tight and fitting so I could mess with it.

4. FF space shuttle backpack. I'd use this as an actual backpack, fr srs fr srs holmes.

5. FF neck-in brace. You seriously need to go to the link and see all the different ways this baby can be worn. Also doubles as strangling device.

6. FF roller skates. Complete with toe-stops (as featured in the Archie comics!).

7. FF colorblock headphones. Forget those pretentious earbuds that come with your iPod touch, colorful inconvenience is wear it's at!

8. AA sheer socks. Not like EVERYONE has these or anything, not like they're a tad overPRICED or anything, not like they wouldn't FIT me or anything. I need these.

9. AA lame leggings. *See spiel at #8*

10. AA windbreaker. It looks like candy. Really, really, shiny candy.

11. Luella bat mask. Hey now! Luella? That's ambitious. And delicious. And nutritious. Oy, the pun opportunities....can't....resist....AND MALICIOUS.

12. Jonathon Saunders dress. On sale for $1,376.25! Get em while they're hot!

13. Modcloth vintage pullover. So what if this top is sold out? It will always be in stock in my heart.

14. AA fanny pack. And you thought I was done with my 80's obsession!

And last, the ultimate-CAPS AND BOLD AND ITALICS ULTIMATE- desire: THE ALEXANDER MCQUEEN TRIGGER SHOULDER BAG. It's duh-maz-ing. See that shadow under it? That means it's HOLY.

So...desirable...that...buckle...shiny...black...beautiful...*dies*

62 comments:

Squishybubble said...

Oooo....MUST. HAVE. THEM ALL!!!
Especially the bag. dies along with tavi.

tiaraco said...

The bag is the ultimate. It is going on my wish list for sure!

Erin said...

Aaahhh, so many pretty things!! I must have those sunglasses.

Hanna said...

Oh Tavi, you're so amusing! And only you could wear so many colours at once and not look like some kind of manic clown/kindergartner who clearly skipped Montessori school.

Eilidh said...

I lurrrrrve Fredflare. Rollerskates are a stroke of genius.

J e s s i c a said...

Your so funny.
i bet you will grow up to be really smart and important.
<3
jess

oh and i wish i hat the batman glasses :( really really wish !

Ashlyn said...

Tavi, I know it's a little late, but your back and yay!! That excites me to no end!
And those American Apparel sunglasses ARE magical. How did I not see those in the store...?

Laurel said...

That little blue lightbulb on the K-Mart commercials can shut it. I hate him. You know who else I hate? The Burger King AND the new commercial with his CREEPY ASS 'child'. Notice that I put child in quotes, because it's not a 'child' it's more like a demon. A 'demon child'. There that's better.

Let's go to CVS and get ourselves some of those hot binders and skip class, go to AA and buy awesome sunglasses.

YESSIR! Love you!

Fashion Slacker said...

ah, I love Fred Flare. So many good things. I wish they had an actual store.

Biianca said...

awww hahah thanks!

your wish list is fabulous!!!!
we must get those sheeer socks!!!!

Annie said...

man i ban myself from fredflare cuz theres always too many nice things and here u are shoving cute rompers and stuff in my face hahaha.
=(

ANGST said...

You just DOUBLED my wishlist.

*dies right along with you!*

♥ANGST

Inside the Cabinet of Wonder said...

wonderful things all of them..i love love, and i am in love with the headphones!!

Arkady said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Arkady said...

Wow. . .could've picked a less crowded day to put my first comment, huh? First off, I got here on a link from bits and bobbins and read basically all your posts.

And you are amazing. Your outfits are really original and whimsical, and I confess that you have assuaged about half of my worries about my future children's style. (It was the half about creativity being a magic switch that only turns on at age thirteen. Seems stupid in retrospect. The other half was about them rebelling against me and wearing polos and shorts and flip-flops.)

I would also like to point out that I own an OFFICIAL catholic schoolgirl JUMPER--just that much more fabric than your skirt. The drop-waist is right below my natural waist and I had to cut the armholes so they didn't kill me.

Also I am not a 40-year-old man who is stalking you. Really. No.

City Chic Please said...

ahhh, all that AA stuff is just fantastic. i would seriously set up housing in american apparel for myself; it's great there.

and the mcqueen bag is amazing. it's a piece of art, for sure...

Lauren said...

you crack me up! i love your blog. :)

montypython101 said...

haha tavs, u and that bag will marry and hav many little children who hav buckles on them!! tavi, u should be the mascot for that group Fanny Pak on America's Best Dance Crew. they're completely 80s and ALWAYS wear fanny packs. i bet they would make u a bigger star than u already are!

marli said...

those headphones are killer. been coveting them myself for a few months now... glad someone else appreciates their greatness.

lovely blog by the way. just added it to my google reader.

Shen-Shen said...

You're cute/hilarious!

I'm lusting after those lamé leggings myself.

Rora said...

ah tavi, you make me smile so much! and those roller skates...so adorable. i will probably not last the week without them :P

wegrynisgross said...

Hey! I actually STARTED reading your blog after the whole NYMag incident and haven't stopped.

(And I never for once believed that you weren't writing it.)

But anyway I think your wish list is kind of fantastic and your blog is relatively addictive!

Just had to (finally) say so!

Claudia said...

I think a lot of people die along with you, included me. Those pretty pretty pretty things, they are all caps and italics and bold worthy!

Rosé Ghislain Magritte said...

#11! luella is amazing.

Teresa said...

That bag...I want.

Nice and Shiny said...

Ha, aww Tav your hilarious.
The thought of summer ending is not a good one! I saw some back to school tv spot yesterday and I got really depressed!
Shopping is the only good thing that comes with the end of summer.
ps- I have huge headphones like that, they're awsome! Even if I look like a dj while walking around in them, Whatev!

Sugar Pop said...

I need those headphones. Unfortunately, I am so broke, that I can hardly efford buying the ones they give you for free on an airplane.

:(

Hope yer havin' a fun at your cottage!

Btw, I need an invite to look at Yoncto's blog? D:

fashionholics anon said...

oooh :) the bag is so glorious! i love reading your blog you're absolutely so much fun. i <3 tavi

Shade said...

ahhh yummers. Lovee everything!

bonjour girl said...

i love all of it.
the mcqueen bag is divine.

if your blog gets any cooler i think i'll scream.
would do you mind if i included you in a list of my favorite blogs on my own blog?

Annie said...

!!! How have I never known about Fred Flare?!

Gabsterr said...

your so funny Tavi.

If you get these things i will go to your house in the middle of the night and steal them from your closet :)

Laurel said...

TAVI HOLY HELL - LOOK!

http://jezebel.com/5033470/was-kathleen-turner-soused-on-martha-stewart

Blitzed-ass Turner time!


WUV YOU

Gloria said...

I would really like to see how the luella bat mask looks on...!

elizabeth said...

it's really too bad our friendship has to END HERE tavz because THE LUELLA MASK IS MINE.

the AA sheer socks are my latest addiction, duh. whhy do i feel like they will be like HIP WADERS on you?? i think you def need the pink ones.

yoncto said...

give me your secret for getting millions of comments, girly.
btdubs, your comment was no where near stalker ish. in fact it was vair sweet. i am very self obsessed so it sorta made my day =]
WEAR IT YONCTO STYLE!!!!
nice pics, btdubs. i looove the backpack!

it's an addiction. said...

wow those headphones are something else!
holy colours batman. but they're good picks.
i love the luella mask- great for days when you feel like hiding from the world haha. i wonder what they would say at my office.

i enjoy reading everyday!

xo K

Vanessa said...

you must be the only 12 year old i know who loves Alexandra Mcqueen.
legend!
xoxo

J e s s i c a said...

ohmygod i was urban outfitters blog and your totally featured on it !
Congrats little one
:))

Emily said...

#8 please. i'm so into over-the-knee socks and the fact that these are sheer sets them apart from the numerous opaque options out there!

Cheyenne said...

I love all of your quirky finds!

lalaliu said...

the bat mask is awesome!! school starting is such a great excuse for shopping :D
you'll sure be the coolest kid at school.

Little Miss Quirky (a.k.a. Gabby) said...

Your captions are HILARIOUS. Usually, I hate when people write "LOL" because it's like "seriously, I bet you didn't even laugh out loud. So please, don't toy with my emotions." But, this time I actually did... LOL.

p.s. Can we link? I absolutely adore your blog and, er, may have already linked you...:].

nostyleboys said...

I definitely need a fanny pack!
your blog is so cute
and you're so stylin

Sydney Speel said...

what a fabulous bag.

futurelint said...

hey Tavi! American Apparel is trying to take over my budget! Food, mortgage and all! P.S. if you don't have $52 laying around for that windbreaker, I so have one on my etsy you can have for $18, and it's shiny and red and deadstock... http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=12833219

and who knows, I might just mail it to you in this, before I even put it up in the shop
http://i293.photobucket.com/albums/mm44/futurelint/100_0850.jpg
I know, I know, it's no McQueen but it's as good as vintage is going to get to that holy grail of bags...

P.P.S. you're pretty flippin' hip

Belle said...

I love the FF sweatshirt, and the Alexander McQueen bag is very very cute, I love the shape of it.
belle

i think thats hauttte said...

hey i just saw your blog on the urbanoutfitters blog thing ;]] thatscool, congrats!

Dang said...

Oh man! Oh man! Oh man! The headphones!

FYP said...

i almost died too, you know!
ha, i love your blog. you crack me up. (:

purkua.idil said...

that bag is beautiful. it's so charming. this is a great blog by the way. i will be adding you to my bloglist.

http://purkua.blogspot.com
fashion.. passion.. love..

TheCautionaryWhale said...

I love every ssingle thing on this list. The bag is incredible.

Sydney Speel said...

i saw #7 for $97.00.

you could say i was, disappointed.

Richel said...

How hot is that fanny pack? I seriously don't think they're strictly reserved for middle aged mothers and worn out science teachers.

kelsea said...

the backpack. the headphones. the cat mask. the trigger shoulder bag. AWESOME!!!!

Maura said...

You can't wear PVC/lame leggings. You're twelve! Skintight, shiny leggings are for older girls/hookers. That being said, you are a really cool little kid. Please keep writing.

Tavi said...

Thanks guys!
Maura-Fr srs? I think it depends on how you wear the leggings. Not that I can afford them, but if I did ever get those I would wear them in a very non hooker manner.

Cranberry said...

Omg American Apparel is such a total rip off, but it doesnt stop me from spending all my money on it..arghhh..its like crack!!!!
that bag is to DIE for!
ps. adding you to our blog roll

Soul Tanggg said...

ooh I love that mcQueen bag!!!

r said...

I LOVE FRED FLARE SO MUCH!
and i have been eyeing on numba 3 all summer, alas..it is september...and none of the items on your glorious list are in my hands :(

hahha time to raid the madre's closet! she was a fashion designer in the 90's and has all this outrageous vintage clothing which i am dyeing to wear chica!

ah!
but keep up the wonderful work! i read about you in Times and thought your blog was fabulous :)


tut-tut for now!
Raveena

r said...

(i always do this.)
oh!
AND!
umm have you seen some stuff on angie hearts?
its a japanese online shop with tons of cutesy stuff...not really vintage haha...or mod cloth?...also online? very cute..very expensive... :(

if only clothing came free....

JO said...

it's the kind of bag that i loooove so badly !!! kind of a vintage bag that nobody, but you, has !! but infortunatly i'ven't it and since mcqueen died it must be super super expensive !!
i've just fallen in love with that bag when i' saw it ! I WANT IT ! don't care if it was one/two/ten seasons ago !