October 1, 2008

i'm torn

I am taking a break from being pissed at Rei.

I'm still not over the fact that she didn't design a kid's line for H&M, and I'm still upset that the H&M dress will cost a whopping 350 smackers.

But-BUT-the Comme Des Garcons line is out.

And it is my duty to report.
So I will.

HOWEVER, Rei, this dies NOT mean I have forgiven you. I am still darn tooting ANGRY over your H&M line, however amazing it may be. I am still very, VERY mad over the pain and suffering you have caused me. The nights of sobbing, the days of watching day time television and eating sugary cereal. I'm almost scarred for life. Do not even TRY to apologize.Oh screw it. Why even pretend.

I LOVE THE SANTA CLAUS BEARDS, AND THE ITCHY LOOKING HAIR, AND THE SOCCER BALL SHOES, AND THE TIN FOIL TOPS, AND THE BEAR COSTUMES, AND THE WHOLE GENIUS THING.
THIS IS BEAUTIFUL.
LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL.
YOU, REI, ARE BEAUTIFUL.

Besides, once you think about it, you can't hold a grudge forever, can you? I mean, think of all the Fashion Weeks to come! So really, this is beneficial for both of us. A mature person would get over it and forgive you, so that's what I'll do.

So now that I've forgiven you...how about you give me a few of those craycray wigs for free? And maybe we could also go out to lunch? I'll buy you waffles?

No?

Okay. That works too.
*hug*

Oh Rei, I'm so glad we're friends again! Now we're gonna talk aboot who's getting fat, and who's getting anorexic, and we'll pig out on ice cream since you're too old to care and I'm too young for it to matter, and we'll have tea parties where we bring our teddy bears and Japanese Street Style Girl dolls, and-GASP-we should buy the same clothes! And MATCH! And then we can be TWINS! Oh, Rei! I'm so glad you have excellent design skills that overpower my usually very persisent grudge-holding abilities! Come on BFF, let's go buy matching narcissistic Karl purses! Oh Rei, I just love being best friends!

19 comments:

hazel said...

you are way too funny.
you should DIY a wig like that.
you're probably one of the only bloggers who'd have the guts to actually wear it.

Arabelle said...

omg son. hazel is SO RIGHT. me you and Rei will be TWINS in our geometric dresses and oddball white hair. i think we could totez used like, a white wig and spray it with starch of get laundry fuzz and glue it into a ball...

hazel said...

that's the spirit arabelle! be triplets!!!

montypython101 said...

tavi-u can write a blog book. like a fiction story?? i imagine it selling A LOT. why?? because it would be so funny with the main character being friends with all the designers and all. PLEASE TAVI. for the sake of the book world!

jess said...

That was a really funny post.I love the new collection. I really like the wigs to they remind me of marie antoinette a bit. I looked at the collection at my friends house and I was swooning over it and they just looked at me like I lost it again.

Corie said...

i agree with jess. it does remind me of marie antoinette. a gothic one. i looove those soccer ball shoes though

sammi-lise ^_^ said...

I also love the collection...so marie antoinette-esque.

I love you for being so ridiculously funny, and montypython is right, write a book!

I would definitely buy a copy!!!

love ya lots, and hope you can visit my blog sometime (I know I have been saying this a lot but please visit!!!)

Nature Grafitti said...

i adoreeed this whole collection :)

Laurel said...

Guhhh Tav - this is why I love you, because we have semi-breakups with designers.

I'm glad to see you and Rei are back together, I decided after a long deliberation, I'm getting back together with Mr. Ghesquière due to his use of shiny space material and not allowing me to look away from the light and the color and the AH I CAN'T TAKE IT - it's love.

Don't hold it back, I say! So listen to this song and have a waffle party with Rei in Santa-beard-hair.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ujnH4yNqL8E

BAHAHA

I LOVE YOU T, BABY.

Wendy said...

The fact that its so expensive is so disappointing.

Inspire the Starling said...

Rei is a legend...in every single way. I've always adored her work...right from the word go. I am however, ill-informed about the H&M collection. Although I would wear some of the girls pieces,. do you know if she's doing a mens line?! Cx

Eva said...

That was a classique post!!! I adore it. So witty and right on. I love Rei even though her line is a bit pricey, she is still my bff simply b/c she is a designers, designer. Simple and artistic and complicated and nonsensical.

www.gastrogirls.com

Hannah Cheeto said...

You are hilarious! And I agree that you should DIY one of those wigs... it would be so awesome.

beccajanie said...

this post was hilariously awesome.

The crazy wigs were out there but also amazing at the same time.

leah said...

i absolutely love your blog. i read it everyday. you're one of the coolest people in the world. hands. down.

m.elizabeth said...

I don't blame you at all, if there is ANY reason in the world to throw out a grudge, that collection is it. x19339990000000000000 plus some.

ps post in general made me giggle.. I adore the way you write. whoever said you should make a book, I second it. done? done. grood. go write the next bible.

hey boo said...

You said it so well, I laughed, I cried... On a more serious DIY note, I just spray painted my suede lace ups from last year with white spray paint and put new black laces in them and they look great. I can't have the wig or the dress but my fake shoes will cheer me up.

KD said...

Do you read fakekarl.blogspot.com ? you should.

Tavi said...

inspire the starling-Rei most certainly did! I linked the collection in the word "amazing" so you can view it there.

kd-oh definitely. it's hilarious.