alien she

I haven't posted pictures of this...shrine? of mine before because it's almost a bit too precious, but it's so relevant to the vibes in everything I'm posting right now. I am definitely going through a phase with vomit pink and Laura Palmer's Secret Diary and black swans and white swans and girls. It should be noted that I don't equate "girl"with pink and red and bows and dolls and babies, the entire aesthetic is more about mocking those connotations, though I would be lying if I said I never really just wanted to indulge in bows and glitter and sickening cheesiness.

In Real Life terms, it's like how I'm really into high school drama and talking about Taylor Swift ~pwoblemz~ because I love how funny it all is, but I think it's perfectly natural and healthy to sincerely enjoy that stuff too. Obviously, there's much more to teenage girls and the thoughts of such than boys with noteworthy eyeballs, but I resent the idea that such thoughts are, in our culture, considered vapid because they're also considered specific to young females. Larger scale examples of "girl=dumb," or, "what we deem as 'girl' even though a lot of girls don't fit that stereotype=dumb": "Twilight fans are so lame and dumb and sad!" (see also: Justin Bieber fans), "Joanna Newsom's music sounds too delicate, by which I mean, feminine!", and Kathleen Hanna being told that she couldn't be A Smart Feminist who also said the word "like" in the excessive way that is typically thought of as specific to teenage girls.

The fact that "smart" and "girly" have to be mutually exclusive gets in the way for someone like me who would like to go to school wearing an outfit I obviously spent time on picking out or with my classmates knowing that I spend a lot of time writing and thinking about clothes -- since fashion too is considered a "girl" thing-- and still be taken seriously when it comes to class discussions. It's also worth noting that in all the times I've been accused of being an adult posing as someone younger and writing this blog, and considering that we live in a society in which women are not always judged solely based on merit and so criticisms towards women should be examined for sexist stereotypes, I'm going to take a wild guess that some suspicions stemmed from the idea that a teenage girl who likes fashion can't also do something that requires some very basic knowledge. Do you like how I passive aggressively added that in the end there?

With all that said, let's indulge in some bows and glitter, yes?
Jewelry throughout from Meadham Kirchhoff (gifts), joke shop, the depths of our house, thrift stores/flea markets/yard sales, and on Etsy: Flamingo Cupcake Studios, Leafpeople Vintage, and Bookhouse Creations.

we don't have to smile if we don't want to

I have not been taking Beat Happening or Daria too seriously, I simply have Chronic Bitchface, along with Chronic Tiredface and Chronic Why Are You Here Go Away Face. (Thank you Isabel for the link.)

While most Chicagoans (read: those with an ounce of common sense) know the weather should not be 45 degrees in the last weeks of school, I'm enjoying being able to wear sweaters and socks. I'd like it to get nowhere above 70 degrees this summer. The poor fortune of all those relatives who arrived at O'Hare today with inner tubes already around their sunscreened stomachs and sunglasses on even though they hadn't seen the outside for the two hours it takes to get from Jersey City to Chicago has worked in my favor! My condolences to Uncle Jim and Aunt Janet and happy Memorial Day to all.
I wore this yesterday, vomit pink, etc., and also lately I've been trying to familiarize myself with this "physical comfort" thing I've been hearing about. My comfort zone for a while was being uncomfortable, having lots of layers and pins to adjust, since it made me feel like I was being unboring, so now I'm trying to be comfy, and unboring with the use of random fun things, as shown above. Also, black lipstick. Thrifted sweater and skirt, heartschallenger Kurtney Sassy tee.
American Apparel socks and Rachel Antonoff shoes, both gifts from said brands.
That Poison Apple person on Etsy needs to stop appealing to my interests, because it's seriously putting my gumball fund in jeopardy. If it were putting my gumball fund on Jeopardy, maybe it would be smart enough to win money so that I could buy Twin Peaks patches and a gumball. I am hilarious! That joke didn't totally work. Also, I finished Twin Peaks and don't know what to do anymore other than eat a lot of donuts and hug myself to sleep every night. In search of more visual and intellectual stimulation, I have been reliving Lizzie McGuire:
Visual stimulation, that still; intellectual stimulation, that comment.

this is not a love song

Happy We're All Going to Hell Day! Meagan and I celebrated by getting pizza, in a true Daria and Jane like manner.
Do not be fooled by our Goth Girl Problems of black lipstick while eating or likeness to such disaffected fictional characters, however! We are just as loserly enthusiastic as any one of you kids reading a blog on a Saturday night. More, even! I'm the one writing this!
Meagan said she knew today must've been the Rapture because she saw a guy clipping his nails on the train. She was dressed appropriately for Hell, all dark and angry and stuff. I feel very lucky to have a friend to look angsty with.
I was thinking of prom night vibes and being able to layer even the slightest bit in this weather. Awkwardly hanging diapery hand-me-down jumper, thrifted cardigan, PIL pun top gift from Obesity and Speed, and vintage Docs.
A random ring I found in our house and a very important ring from Flamingo Cupcake Studios on Etsy. Can you believe a person was making jewelry of pictures of my husband and then selling it on the internet? Creepy! I told him he should take legal action but he asked me what "legal" meant.
I'm really obsessed with this tapestry bag backpack Roxeanne sent me in a package swap. I have decorated it with a Wednesday Addams patch from Poison Apple Studios on Etsy and brooches from here and there.

won't you let me walk you home from school? won't you let me meet you at the pool?*

With two weeks of school left, I am into combining back to school vibes with summer vibes, which can be summarized metaphorically in this post's title.
Jerry Hall on a road trip in Texas, Stand By Me, Mary Ellen Mark, Sally Mann, Edward Hopper, Cindy Sherman (this here Untitled #96 is now the most valuable photograph in the world, GET IT CINDY SHERMAN), William Eggleston, Irving Penn.

*If you understand this reference to "Thirteen" by Big Star, congratulations! You may now consider yourself a member of the Cultural Elite.**
**If you understand this reference to Tina Fey's new book, double congratulations! I wish I'd thought of it so I made up this second asterisk to seem clever, and also not plagiarize.

bulimia is so '87

In these last weeks before summer I've been trying to soak up the back to school vibes before Chicago settles on some legitimate summer heat and it becomes too unbearable for vibes of any kind, other than like, "sweaty vibes," or "what-does-one-wear-to-watch-Seinfeld-all-day vibes." And so, some Heathers/iconography in Romeo + Juliet thinkin the other day.
The Heathers tee was sent to me by Sophomore, the Veronica + JD necklace is from Flamingo Cupcake on Etsy, and I thrifted the HALEY necklace and like to think about why it ended up at the Salvation Army.
Hair thangs.

Too much angst in this club! Pockets and back of my thrifted sweater, HOLE RIOT WOMYN DANIEL JOHNSTON ETC.

I bought these James Lillis holy leggings on BlackMilk and they've become a really important part of my identity. My Docs are falling apart and the sole is halfway disconnected from the rest of the shoe so I like to wiggle my toes to make my feet talk.

Bracelet from joke shop.

I was really feeling this black lipstick Lime Crime sent me to test and I think it will become a regular fixture. It's good and matte and didn't need much reapplication throughout the day and does its job.

Traveling Light

After my sister and I posted Chalk this past summer, the ladies in the group Stealing Sheep asked if Rivkah would make a lil video to their music, which is so sweet and weirdly dark and fitting to all the Amelie vibes we were feeling in the summer, so she did, and I kind of did too, and it was fun, and here it is.

Traveling Light is a lot about that stage between being a kid and an adult, which I think about a lot, and was especially thinking about when we made this in the summer as I was about to enter high school. It's really weird when you realize that makeup has gone from being a dress up box occasion to an every day requirement, and you start looking for bubblegum cigarette ways to make these two stages make sense and be friends, but helping Rivkah make this made it easier to be able to have some kind of grasp on it, since this video is a series of those searches and moments as well as Rivkah and me being summery and liking hats. There isn't much of a plot or progression aside from that, I guess it's more like a photo for its moment-capturing than a story. And, us being sisters, a lot of details in this we took from our own memories, so it's, y'know, personal and appropriately nostalgic and I'm proud of us and her and our sisterly teamwork.

I have a lot more to say about these ideas in general but that's what the video is for. I like what Rivkah wrote, too. Also, I just last night finished a zine that's very much about this stuff (though a little more high school in mentality and subject matter as I'm not as hesitant to be a teenager as I was last summer) and I think I'll put it up on Etsy soon or something. Also also, listen to Stealing Sheep's beautiful music!

P.S. It's just a coincidence but I think it's kinda funny I ended up posting this on Sofia Coppola's birthday.

stick hippo

Last night Marisa and I had the ultimate slumber party. We ordered pizza, wore tiaras to see PROM with Jamie and my friend Claire, made friendship bracelets, and read aloud from Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret. We sat in our PJ's talking about high school and Catalanos and Rayannes and feminism. It was the ultimate! Like that song Lindsay Lohan sang in Freaky Friday. We also talked about Lindsay Lohan.
Quality temporary tattoos.
Tiaras, one passed down from Marisa and one from Walgreens.
Note the American Girl sleeping bag.

My So-Called Life theme Cut Your Hair by Pavement Teenage Whore by Hole Teenagers From Mars by the Misfits Lust For Life by Girls Loop Duplicate My Heart by Suburban Kids With Biblical Names Boyfriend by Best Coast Girls Just Wanna Have Fun by Cyndi Lauper Bad Reputation by Joan Jett Rebel Girl by Bikini Kill 16 and Suicide by Huggy Bear Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana Sixteen by No Doubt I Was a Teenage Werewolf by the Cramps I Can Never Go Home Anymore by the Shangri-Las At Seventeen by Janis Ian Thirteen by Big Star Playground Love by Air Baba O'Riley by the Who Teen Age Riot by Sonic Youth. Download here for when you're angsty, or for always, or maybe both of those are the same thing for you!
Then she left and I acted really cool taking pictures of myself smiling in front of my house!!!! It's this kind of social activity that won me the title of prom queen. Back to school vibes, Twin Peaks, etc. Top gift from Meadham Kirchhoff, thrifted jumper, random Boy London patch and socks.
And my favorite white picket fence birthday loafers Rachel Antonoff gave me.

Also, quick question, just been on my mind lately, I dunno -- WHY IS IT NOT SUMMER?